{"id":104822,"date":"2019-05-06T07:20:52","date_gmt":"2019-05-06T11:20:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp.oviahealth.com\/guide\/104822\/parenting-step-in-toddler-arguments\/"},"modified":"2021-12-09T19:53:39","modified_gmt":"2021-12-10T00:53:39","slug":"parenting-step-in-toddler-arguments","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/www.oviahealth.com\/guide\/104822\/parenting-step-in-toddler-arguments\/","title":{"rendered":"When to step in to toddler arguments"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It\u2019s natural to want to come to <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span>\u2019s defense when you hear <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> arguing with another child, or for you to want to intervene when <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they starts<\/span> squabbling with <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> siblings. After all, you want <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> to get along with <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> peers, and to make friends, and arguments seem to go against that goal. However, before you jump in and start to play referee, it\u2019s important to remember that arguments actually play an important part in <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> social development.<\/span><\/p>\n<h4><strong>The pros of arguments<\/strong><\/h4>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Problem-solving: <\/strong><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Arguments start with a disagreement, and there\u2019s no avoiding the fact that at some point, <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> is going to have an issue with <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> playmates. Maybe <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they wants<\/span> a toy that another child won\u2019t share, or another child tells <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> that <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they can\u2019t<\/span> join in a game at the park. While this is no fun to watch, watching from the sidelines for a bit to see how <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they responds<\/span> gives <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> the chance to try to figure out a solution to the problem on <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> own. Where there is a problem, there is also a solution. Giving <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> time to work through a disagreement helps <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> learn that problems can be solved peacefully.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><strong>Compromise: <\/strong><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Life isn\u2019t always going to go the way <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> wants, or the way <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they<\/span> plans, and it\u2019s a lesson <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they\u2019s<\/span> going to learn over and over again in a hundred little ways as <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they grows<\/span> up. When you step in during a conflict, siding either with <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> or the opposing party, you\u2019re reaching the compromise for <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span>. By letting <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> work on negotiating on <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> own, you\u2019re helping <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> learn important skills like taking turns, waiting, the fact that compromising with others can mean they keep wanting to play with you, and other lessons that can help out down the road.<\/span><\/li>\n<li><strong>Emotional intelligence: <\/strong><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Working through tricky situations with peers helps <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> learn to express <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> feelings. As <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they gets<\/span> better at this, <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they will<\/span> also grow more comfortable with expressing <span data-pronoun=\"themselves\" class=\"pronoun-themselves\">themselves<\/span>. Give <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> the chance to stand <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> ground, and soon enough, <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they won\u2019t<\/span> need you to rush to the rescue!<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Working through problems with other children can teach <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> some great skills for the school years and beyond, if you resist the urge to come right to <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> defense when <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they disagrees<\/span> with <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> peers. If the argument is getting out of hand, grows physical, or seems like a case of bullying, it\u2019s still your role to step in to break up the situation, but the rest of the time, it can be helpful to give <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> some time to work things out on <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> own &#8211; and you may be surprised as how well <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they handles<\/span> these early confrontations.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s a dog-eat-dog world on the playground, but toddler fights can serve an important purpose.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":236634,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ovia_author_name":"","ovia_author_prefix":"","ovia_author_image":"","ovia_content_type_id":"177","ovia_product_mode":"13","ovia_days_from_signup":"","ovia_days_from_lmp":"","ovia_days_from_baby_birth":"913","ovia_days_from_enroll":"","ovia_health_module_days_from":"","ovia_article_for_email_days_from":"913","ovia_health_module":"","ovia_legacy_id2":"","ovia_ttc":"","ovia_article_subtype":"","ovia_health_symptom":"","ovia_partner_id":"","ovia_partner_custom_group":"","ovia_legacy_category":"9","ovia_legacy_category2":"260","ovia_content_url_id":"104822","ovia_include_share_buttons":"","ovia_fertility_goal":"","ovia_secondary_module":"","ovia_trimester":"","ovia_child_age":"","ovia_share_image":"","ovia_more_menu_image":"","ovia_button1_url":"","ovia_days_from_postpartum":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"fert-category":[],"preg-category":[],"parent-category":[112,115,116],"fert-tag":[],"preg-tag":[],"parent-tag":[],"class_list":["post-104822","article","type-article","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","parent-category-babys-development-and-growth","parent-category-language-and-communication-development","parent-category-social-and-emotional-development"],"yoast_head":"<!-- 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