{"id":103161,"date":"2021-01-05T06:34:54","date_gmt":"2021-01-05T11:34:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp.oviahealth.com\/guide\/103161\/parenting-swearing-toddler\/"},"modified":"2021-11-09T17:08:23","modified_gmt":"2021-11-09T22:08:23","slug":"parenting-swearing-toddler","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/www.oviahealth.com\/guide\/103161\/parenting-swearing-toddler\/","title":{"rendered":"Handling a swearing toddler"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Oh shoot. Dang. Darn. <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> has picked up some new vocabulary and wouldn&#8217;t it be great if <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they<\/span> hadn&#8217;t?<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Have you thought about why you don&#8217;t like it if <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> swears? If you&#8217;re going to be correcting <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> behavior, it&#8217;s important to know why it\u2019s important to you that you fix it.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Some swearing is considered rude. The idea of &#8220;rudeness&#8221; comes from breaking social rules that are really complicated for a toddler to understand. For example, think about how behavior is supposed to change depending on where your toddler is eating. The rules for how to act are different depending on if <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they is<\/span> at home, at a restaurant, a really nice restaurant, or a children&#8217;s restaurant for a birthday party. That&#8217;s four different sets of rules for how to act just when you&#8217;re eating! The idea of words that are only acceptable in certain situations, or when said by certain people, can be confusing in the same way.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Other words can be specifically offensive to a particular gender, race, or culture. Offensive words usually have historical meaning, or are meant to be insulting based on who a person is. <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> might be getting good at <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> letters but <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they probably isn&#8217;t<\/span> ready for a social studies lesson.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So how can you teach your toddler not to swear if <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they won&#8217;t<\/span> understand why a word is rude or offensive?<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>Make one label for everything: <\/strong><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can let <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> know that a word is &#8220;bad&#8221; and explain that using it might hurt someone&#8217;s feelings. Keeping track of one group of &#8220;bad&#8221; words will be easier than different groups of different kinds of bad words. <\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>Keep it consistent:<\/strong><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> If you don&#8217;t want <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> swearing at a friends house, don&#8217;t let <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> swear at home either. If bad words are always bad it will be easier to learn not to say them.<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><strong>Be understanding:<\/strong><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> When <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> says something really offensive, <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they doesn&#8217;t<\/span> understand why it&#8217;s so wrong. Harsh punishments like spanking or washing <span class=\"pronoun-their\" data-pronoun=\"their\">their<\/span> mouth with soap are likely to make <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> act out more, and more importantly, they won\u2019t teach <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> anything about treating other people respectfully.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4><strong>Control how you, and others, react<\/strong><\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> loves to get a reaction from you. Positive or negative, when <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> does something and you respond, <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they learns<\/span> something new and exciting about interactions.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of the best strategies for dealing with swearing is to remain neutral and not react at all. If you explain that something is a bad word, try doing it without being angry. You might also be tempted to laugh when <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> curses. Try to avoid laughing or smiling if you can, and let friends and family know if <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> has been using a certain word recently so they&#8217;re also ready to stifle their laughs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It doesn\u2019t matter whether it\u2019s positive or negative reinforcement, reacting is likely to lead to more swearing, not less.<\/span><\/p>\n<h4><strong>Give <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> something new to say<\/strong><\/h4>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Swear words are powerful! We use them to express strong emotions and communicate those emotions to others. When a toddler hears one, <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they\u2019s<\/span> likely to want to try it out for <span data-pronoun=\"themselves\" class=\"pronoun-themselves\">themselves<\/span>. In that case, giving <span class=\"pronoun-them\" data-pronoun=\"them\">them<\/span> a different word to use can help.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One option is to come up with a new curse word, specifically for your family, like &#8220;shabadoo!&#8221; or &#8220;frickles!&#8221; that\u2019s safe to use in your home. You can also teach <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> to simply express what <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they&#8217;s<\/span> feeling out loud, so a swear word turns into &#8220;I&#8217;m real angry!&#8221; or &#8220;I don&#8217;t like this!&#8221;<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you have strong reactions to the new words you\u2019ve come up with, when <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> is upset, and show no reaction to typical swear words, <span class=\"pronoun-baby\" data-pronoun=\"baby\">Baby<\/span> will learn pretty quickly that <span class=\"pronoun-they\" data-pronoun=\"they\">they doesn\u2019t<\/span> need to swear to get your attention. <\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Oh shoot. Dang. Darn. {{ PRONOUN_BABY }} has picked up some new vocabulary and wouldn&#8217;t it be great if {{ PRONOUN_HE_SHE_LOWER }} hadn&#8217;t?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":236114,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ovia_author_name":"","ovia_author_prefix":"","ovia_author_image":"","ovia_content_type_id":"177","ovia_product_mode":"13","ovia_days_from_signup":"","ovia_days_from_lmp":"","ovia_days_from_baby_birth":"699","ovia_days_from_enroll":"","ovia_health_module_days_from":"","ovia_article_for_email_days_from":"","ovia_health_module":"","ovia_legacy_id2":"","ovia_ttc":"","ovia_article_subtype":"","ovia_health_symptom":"","ovia_partner_id":"","ovia_partner_custom_group":"","ovia_legacy_category":"12","ovia_legacy_category2":"250","ovia_content_url_id":"103161","ovia_include_share_buttons":"","ovia_fertility_goal":"","ovia_secondary_module":"","ovia_trimester":"","ovia_child_age":"","ovia_share_image":"","ovia_more_menu_image":"","ovia_button1_url":"","ovia_days_from_postpartum":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"fert-category":[],"preg-category":[],"parent-category":[112,115,122,119],"fert-tag":[],"preg-tag":[],"parent-tag":[],"class_list":["post-103161","article","type-article","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","parent-category-babys-development-and-growth","parent-category-language-and-communication-development","parent-category-parenting-styles","parent-category-raising-baby"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Handling a swearing toddler - Ovia Health<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Oh shoot. 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